Wow, you know how some weeks are sent to challenge you? This week has done that on several levels. The one that sat me down here to write though was the realization, no the hammer-on-the-head moment, that came after speaking with 2 of my oldest friends. These 2 knew me in my University years, watching my initial transformation into the adult I am now. I have stayed close with one, while the other, only recently reunited, renewing our friendship. Both of these inspiring women told me in their own way this week that I was very intense and 'driven' back in the day! One even used the word 'controlling!' Eeek, I must say this took me aback, made me really take a close look at myself, at how my life has transpired and how I came to be at this point in my life. I love how there are infinite possibilities to our lives, all directed by choice, intention, happenstance and 'luck.' I have recently been contributing my actions more to inspiration, being able to listen to that 'inner voice' of wisdom to lead me down my path. However, was it this way when I was in my 20's? Was I a control freak? Am I still a control freak???? I was so determined to experience as much of life as I could possibly squeeze in: living and working in other countries, travelling to as many places as I could possible get to, trying different types of work within my chosen field of nursing, building a dream home, owning a sports car, the list goes on and I did it all! Was this all in preparation for where I am now? Or did it hinder my progress in finding my path?
Here's where the path diverged: meeting my partner and having 2 beautiful children. Suddenly (and it was quite a sudden transition), I had to change my focus to my family. They became the objects of my intensity. The difficult part has been to find balance and peace amidst all the exciting things I want to do, meeting the needs of my family and finding a way to keep myself healthy.
Here is where yoga comes in: finding (stumbling onto) the path that led me to yoga, teaching, and inspiring others to find their path to contentment and joy, has been where my path has been leading all along. No chance, no 'luck', just destiny in finding my way home. There's a kind of peace, an inner balance, knowing I am on the 'right' path, even though it isn't really under my control at all!!